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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24231301">Soundcheck</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_escapist/pseuds/little_escapist'>little_escapist</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Underneath [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Glee</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Anderberry Siblings, Bullying, Character Study, Coming Out, M/M, Pre-Relationship, Secret Crush</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 18:53:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,932</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24231301</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/little_escapist/pseuds/little_escapist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Before a concert, there's a soundcheck to make sure that everything works as it should.</p><p>In high school, Kurt Hummel makes friends. Those friends lead him to new music, which in turn leads him to accepting himself. Somewhere along the way he meets his friend's big brother, Blaine - and that, more than anything else, changes everything. </p><p>Or, the AU where Adam Lambert is Elliott Starchild is Adam Lambert.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Blaine Anderson/Kurt Hummel</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Underneath [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1748998</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>72</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Soundcheck</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This story has been a long time coming. I started writing this in spring 2018, and it wasn't easy. It almost didn't work out at all, and I've started this from scratch at least four times. But now we are here. This is the first part, kind of a prologue, of a three part series called Underneath. The second installment is being written, and I will start posting it in near future. </p><p>WARNING for a retelling of the Karofsky incident in season 2, if that upsets someone.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>2008–2009 Freshman Year</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Kurt Hummel befriends Rachel Berry when he starts at William McKinley High School. He’s not quite sure how it happens. One day during his third week in the new school he’s sitting alone in the cafeteria at lunch, and this girl with braids and a hideous sweater with a deer in the front of it just plops down opposite of him. She starts talking right away, and doesn’t stop.</p><p> </p><p>They share their English and History classes, and Kurt has paid attention to her before. In class she isn’t quite as talkative as outside of it, but he’s noticed her. She’s a bit on the annoying side, very convinced of her own superiority and obsessed with Broadway. She doesn’t seem to shut up, and she has an opinion on every single thing. Kurt doesn’t mind, though. He doesn’t exactly have friends, so it’s nice to have someone to talk to (or in this case, more like someone who talks at him while he tries to keep up). And Kurt shares her passion of musical theater, even though she doesn’t share his fashion sense. They have something in common – they want to flee Lima, Ohio as soon as possible and head out to New York to sing. Also, Kurt is silently and very subtly intrigued by the fact that Rachel has two dads instead of a mom and a dad, like she tells him on their first meeting. That’s something that Kurt isn’t ready to think on any further, but the fact exists and he can’t ignore it.</p><p> </p><p>So, all of a sudden, Kurt has a friend to sit with at lunch and go shopping with. For the first two months or so, Rachel takes care of most of the talking, but then Kurt suddenly finds his voice and they end up actually arguing. Their first fight doesn’t last a day – it’s too lonely sitting without anyone at lunch – and they make up. Rachel also learns a lesson: Kurt isn’t a pushover. Kurt knows himself. He knows what he likes and what he doesn’t like. He feels a lot braver after their fight.</p><p> </p><p>Soon after the first fight with Rachel, Kurt gets another friend. Her name is Mercedes and she’s just as talented as Rachel. Kurt is in Chemistry class with her, and they both hate the subject with a burning passion. They sit next to each other, and soon they realize they share more passions, like music and fashion. Kurt is happy to find someone like-minded in a place like William McKinley High School, where people either ignore him or have unexplainable urges to shove him against the lockers as they pass him. Kurt tries to shrug it off. He knows he’s weird, he hasn’t ever had much friends. He’s used to people being hostile, and at least now he has two friends that seem to like him. They don’t hang out outside of school, but at least he has someone to sit with at lunch and talk to in between classes.</p><p> </p><p>But yeah, Kurt is bullied. It doesn’t end with locker shoves. He’s really afraid of gym class, he hates changing in the same room with the other boys. Sometime in October, little before Kurt started to talk to Mercedes, they invented a new, exciting way to torture Kurt – throwing him into dumpsters. Kurt still mourns some of the clothes he lost because of that. But even that is not the worst thing he has to endure.</p><p> </p><p>They call him fag in the hallways.</p><p> </p><p>That hurts the most. It hurts the most because it rings true. Kurt refuses to think about it any more than that, but he’s aware of himself. He likes hanging out with Rachel and Mercedes, but they don’t appeal to him at all. Neither do the cheerleaders. He doesn’t have any urges to see their boobs, or god help him, anything else. He hears the raunchy words boys throw around in the locker room and it makes him seriously uncomfortable. He tells himself he’s not just ready yet. He also toys around with the idea of asexuality for a moment. Sex scares him, and he’s not attracted to girls. Not to anyone, really. But then something happens that makes him face the truth he’s quietly known about himself for a while.</p><p> </p><p>It’s the beginning of November. Kurt is getting his books from his locker Monday morning when Mercedes rushes over. She looks excited and there’s a glint in her dark eyes.</p><p> </p><p>“You look awfully cheery for a Monday,” Kurt tells her when she stops right next to him.</p><p> </p><p>“Can you come over today after school?” Mercedes asks.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt was about to go home today, and do some homework before getting back to his sewing. He is in the middle of making changes to a jacket he found in a thrift store, and he was kind of looking forward to working with it. It’s been years since someone has asked him to come over, though, and he has never been to Mercedes’ place before. He knows his dad will be happy that he has a friend, even if it’s a girl and they’re more likely to talk about clothes than play sports.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah,” he says to Mercedes. “What’s the occasion?”</p><p> </p><p>“A fabulous album,” Mercedes says, “by this new artist and he’s phenomenal. I want you to listen to it with me.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt nods. “That sounds fun.”</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>That afternoon, they sit in Mercedes’ room that’s decorated with warm brown, violet and pink. Kurt very much approves of her choices. Mercedes puts a record in the player and hits play.</p><p> </p><p>“Listen to this, Kurt,” she says as the song starts. “This guy’s voice is unbelievable.”</p><p> </p><p>And it is. Kurt is transfixed, nodding to Mercedes. The guy, whoever it is, can hit the high notes but also sings so low it makes Kurt’s insides tremble. His music is a bit more on the rock side than Kurt usually listens to, but he loves it. The music flows, it has a party beat with heavy undertones, and above it all, an amazing singer belting out lyrics that speak to Kurt.</p><p> </p><p>“Mercedes, he is fabulous! Who is it?” Kurt asks after the first three songs have passed and he’s dying to know what this guy looks like, how he performs.</p><p> </p><p>“His name is Elliott Starchild, and that’s his debut album that came out three weeks ago.” Mercedes stops the music, walks over to her desk and starts up the computer. “I found him from a video online.”</p><p> </p><p>She opens YouTube and writes something in the search bar while Kurt waits impatiently. Mercedes clicks on a video. “Here,” she says, and Kurt gets up from her bed to get closer to the screen.</p><p> </p><p>After three seconds, Kurt is completely sold. The guy in the video is clearly tall, and he’s wearing a glitter-covered top hat and a shredded t-shirt, showing the tattoos covering his arms. He’s wearing more make-up than Kurt’s ever seen on a man – thick, black eyeliner, shiny lipstick, and polish on his nails. There are multiple rings on his fingers that he keeps moving in and out of sight as he sings. This guy is charismatic, he owns the video, makes eye-contact through the screen and makes Kurt shiver.</p><p> </p><p>Oh yeah. He is definitely not into girls.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt can barely breathe as the video draws to an end and Starchild’s magnetic eyes fade to black. He has never experienced anything quite like that, and he’s seen his fair share of music videos and musicals. He adores Lady Gaga, and he finds himself tearing up during Defying Gravity sometimes. Still, neither of those is anything like this. He runs hot and cold at the same time. Goosebumps rise all over his skin.</p><p> </p><p>“Amazing, huh?” Mercedes says, not really expecting and answer. Her eyes are still glued to the screen that’s now showing recommendations and related videos. “He’s from New York, and he’s openly gay. There’s been a backlash, but from what I gather he has more fans than haters. And I don’t really care, he makes amazing music and sings like an angel. Besides, the world needs someone to shake things up.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt’s heart just about stops. The dreamy guy in the video is gay, out and proud, and Mercedes doesn’t care? The dreamy guy in the video, that totally got a reaction out of Kurt, is gay. He is gay and seems successful. “Wow,” Kurt breathes, not really knowing what to say, how to react. He is not ready to reveal his cards even to his best friend yet. It’s too new, too raw, too real all of a sudden even though he’s known it for a while.</p><p> </p><p>He never thought he’d be into the whole tattooed and pierced thing, but Starchild really, really works for him. Starchild is like a beacon of hope Kurt didn’t know he needed. Maybe he is not destined to fear for his life in Lima forever. He always talks big and says that he’s meant for greater things, but he doesn’t always believe it himself. He has doubts, and he is more than a little scared of life sometimes. But maybe a boy like him can make it out of the small town and into something great.</p><p> </p><p>They end up listening the album twice, and Kurt feels like crying both times when they reach the song Aftermath. The lyrics speak to him, they reach right into his heart and lift it up. <em>Don’t be afraid of what’s inside.</em> He will try not to. He will come to terms with this. That song becomes his favorite right there and then. It’s reassuring when someone tells him that things will be okay. It feels odd and good that someone like Starchild, gorgeous artist with fans and an album, knows exactly how Kurt feels.</p><p> </p><p>Needless to say, Kurt drives straight from Mercedes’ place to the record store and buys the album. He listens to it in his car on the way home, and puts in the player first thing when he gets home. He manages to listen to it twice before dinner, and three times after it, and by then he pretty much knows every song by heart. Aftermath remains his favorite, though.</p><p> </p><p>Rachel gets kind of mad at Kurt and Mercedes, because they both become obsessed with Elliott Starchild. They end up almost always debating lyrics or the two videos Starchild has released, and wondering if they’ll ever get to a concert. Rachel listens to the album, she actually demands to hear it after listening to Marcedes and Kurt gush about it, but she isn’t very into it. She keeps huffing and sighing whenever they’ve spent too much time on one topic – in Rachel’s opinion, that is. One time at lunch she snaps at them. Kurt only retorts that at least he listens to music with some variety, not just Broadway hits. Rachel doesn’t talk to him for the rest of the day, but she forgives him the next morning because she got too lonely.</p><p> </p><p>Starchild fills every spare moment Kurt has to himself. He prints out some photos from Starchild’s website and tacks them to the back of his door. He listens to the album again and again, so much that even his dad starts to hum along to the lyrics. But it doesn’t end there. Kurt daydreams about Elliott Starchild, the man: a real man with tattoos on his muscled arms, with a neatly trimmed beard, and eyeliner enhancing his blue eyes. Then Kurt starts dreaming at night, of vague images and feelings and touches, and wakes up to a wet spot on his bed. Luckily his dad doesn’t mention his need to do a lot more laundry suddenly.</p><p> </p><p>And that’s how Starchild opens up the sexuality that Kurt thought he lacked, and there is no denying it anymore. Kurt Hummel is very much into men. Gay. He tries the word in his mind, and it both thrills and scares him.</p><p> </p><p>But if Elliott Starchild with his tattoos and leather is a revelation, someone else seals the deal and pushes the metaphorical closet door the rest of the way open.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>Rachel has asked Kurt and Mercedes for a sleepover at her house the weekend before Thanksgiving. They plan on watching a movie, eating pizza and gossiping about people at school. Kurt is seriously considering the idea of telling them his secret, making it real. He can’t quite decide, though. What if it’s just Starchild’s general sex appeal that draws him in? What if he’s just making it all up, because everyone seems to be thinking about sex and boyfriends and girlfriends, and so he has to, too? In his heart he knows that’s not true, but his mind keeps coming up with excuses. He’s scared. He’s scared of what he might be, what he pretty certainly is. He can only come out once. There’s no going back after saying it out loud to another human being. He’s scared shitless to say the words out loud, because that makes them true. Saying the words is forever, and they can’t be erased from anyone’s memory. His life will change for good once he says it out loud, voices the thoughts that run rampant in his head all the time.</p><p> </p><p>But a part of him wants to say the words. He wants to talk about it, about how he feels. He wants to open up to his friends and confide in them, and later he wants to talk about boys with them. They will accept him, he knows it – Mercedes said she doesn’t care if Starchild is gay, and Rachel has two fathers. They will support him, and he needs to start being honest. He’s just not quite sure if he can, and what if it’s all just make believe anyway?</p><p> </p><p>Kurt is very nervous as he goes to Rachel’s house on Friday night. He still hasn’t decided, but if the moment allows it, he just might do it. He takes a deep breath before grabbing his overnight bag, says thanks to his dad for driving him, and leaves the car. He might go back home as a completely different person tomorrow. He doesn’t know for sure, but it’s a scary thought.</p><p> </p><p>He rings the doorbell, and the door opens faster than Kurt was ready for. The person greeting him isn’t anyone Kurt has ever seen, and for a moment he panics that he’s at the wrong house even though he knows very well where Rachel lives. The man on the threshold is about Kurt’s height, but some years older than him. His thick hair is slicked back, but it curls at his ears. He has a full mouth and some light stubble on his jaw, and the most mesmerizing honey eyes Kurt has ever stared into.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt is so gay it’s not even funny.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi, you must be Kurt,” the man says and smiles. The smile is so brilliant that Kurt loses every word from his mind, and he can’t answer. He can only stare. “I’m Blaine, Rachel’s brother.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt takes the hand the guy, Blaine, offers. His skin is soft and warm, and the touch sends a little thrill through Kurt.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi,” Kurt squeaks and his face heats up. He knows his voice is high, but that sounded like a three-year-old. Also, why didn’t Rachel ever tell she has a brother?</p><p> </p><p>“Hi,” Blaine echoes, his smile toning down a little but remaining warm and sincere. “Come on in.”</p><p> </p><p>“Thanks,” Kurt says and walks past Blaine, and thankfully his voice comes out closer to normal this time.</p><p> </p><p>“Rachel is upstairs, you can go on up.”</p><p> </p><p>“Thanks,” Kurt says again, because he really wants to keep talking to Blaine, though he has nothing to say. “It’s nice to meet you.”</p><p> </p><p>“You too,” Blaine says, his voice soft and friendly. Kurt wants to listen to it forever. Instead, he just heads up the stairs and takes a deep breath that he holds until he opens the door to Rachel’s room without knocking.</p><p> </p><p>Rachel looks up at him from where she’s lounging on the bed, DVDs in her hands. Everything is like it has always been – the bright colors, the pin board on the wall filled with Rachel’s dreams, the bedazzled CD-player on the drawers. Rachel looks the same, her brown hair in pigtails and the sweater as ugly as ever, tonight featuring a rabbit. Still everything has changed. Rachel has a Disney prince of a brother that Kurt knew nothing about.</p><p> </p><p>“Kurt! I didn’t hear the doorbell. I can’t decide between Grease and Sound of Music,” Rachel says. As usual, she is completely oblivious to the turmoil in Kurt’s head. It must show on his face, because he feels shaken and a little giddy.</p><p> </p><p>“Why haven’t you told me you have a brother?” Kurt asks, ignoring Rachel’s dilemma.</p><p> </p><p>Rachel just stares at him. “What?”</p><p> </p><p>“You have a brother!” Kurt exclaims a bit louder than he meant to, spreading his arms.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah?” It’s half agreement, half question. “Blaine isn’t around much, he doesn’t live here anymore. He’s in college in Columbus.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt stares at her. Rachel acts as if it’s not a big deal that she suddenly has an extra brother. “I’ve known you for months, and you’ve never mentioned him.”</p><p> </p><p>“It’s not like we talk about our families that much,” Rachel points out lightly. “All I know about Mercedes is that her dad is a dentist and that she has a big brother. He’s a senior now, I think.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt walks over and slumps down on the bed next to Rachel. He has to admit that Rachel is right. They don’t share about their families much, too busy debating about music and school work. He hasn’t told his friends that his mom is dead. He isn’t sure he wants to, yet, because he hates the pitiful looks he gets when he tells anyone about it.</p><p> </p><p>“But you have a hot brother,” he blurts out and regrets is instantly. He did not mean to come out like this!</p><p> </p><p>Rachel doesn’t blink an eye. “Yeah, he does look nice, I’m not blind. He sings really well, our dads keep telling us that our duets should be international entertainment one day.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt just sits there, letting her ramble on about duets with her brother. Rachel didn’t react to his outburst at all, and Kurt doesn’t know what to think about it. It’s as if Kurt always comments on guys and their appearance. He has no idea how to continue the conversation, still reeling about his slip-up.</p><p> </p><p>“Kurt?” Rachel’s eyes are curious. “It’s not that weird that I can admit my brother is good-looking! We’re not even related, he’s adopted and dads got me with a surrogate. Besides Blaine is old.”</p><p> </p><p>Sweet, self-centered Rachel Berry, Kurt thinks and smiles a little. “No, Rachel, it’s fine.”</p><p> </p><p>That’s when Mercedes arrives with a loud “Rachel Berry, why didn’t you ever tell me that you have a big brother?” and Kurt breaths out in relief.</p><p> </p><p>He doesn’t come out that night. He’s too busy thinking about this new information about Rachel’s family, and then he gets too preoccupied with Rachel sharing that she has a crush on Finn Hudson. The night goes by fast, in a whirl of gossip, speculation and eventually, Grease.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>2009-2010 Sophomore Year</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Sophomore year is different from the start. The bullying gets worse. Kurt is greeted with a dumpster toss on his second day back at school, and it sets the tone from then on. Pretty much every morning begins from the dumpster. Kurt would feel completely depressed if it wasn’t for Mercedes and Rachel.</p><p> </p><p>Bullying is not the only thing that changes, though. Mr. Schuester, the Spanish teacher, takes over the glee club from scary Mr. Ryerson. Mercedes texts Kurt that Rachel has already put her name on the audition list. Kurt and Mercedes decide to do the same. Kurt is happy with the development, because his dad has been on his case about joining a club. Of course Burt would prefer football or even soccer, but Kurt does what he wants. Glee is perfect, because he might actually get to sing. Joining the club won’t make him popular or help with the bullying, but it will be something to pass the time in a fun way, he hopes. He will get to do something he likes, and it might make all of school more bearable.</p><p> </p><p>So, the three of them join the glee club. There are also two freshmen, Artie and Tina. Artie is in a wheelchair and Tina has a stutter, but she does not stutter when she sings. Mr. Schuester looks at them with a clear despair in his eyes. Before the week is over, he gets Finn Hudson to join the club. No one really knows how, but Rachel sure is excited about it. The club may be small and they might be misfits, but it’s the most fun Kurt’s had in high school. Also, he develops a kind of a crush on Finn. Finn is nicer to him than the others, and he seems like a decent guy underneath the pressure to conform to whatever high school wants you to be. Kurt’s crush on Finn doesn’t stop him from going to Rachel’s every time he hears that Blaine is visiting home, though. It’s nice to just say hello and bask in Blaine’s gorgeous smile for a while. Neither of his crushes will go anywhere, and Kurt knows that. He only wants to indulge a little. It’s all he has.</p><p> </p><p>Sophomore year is also different because Kurt comes out. Finally. Out of the blue Mercedes starts to fancy him, and it leaves him no choice but the truth. He is scared shitless and his hands shake as he hugs his books to his chest, but he finally says the words that have been in the back of his tongue for a long while now. It’s like coming clean.  Mercedes is really nice about it, too. All of the glee club is on his side. Even his dad is fine with it. Kurt listens to Starchild’s Aftermath one night, thinking back to the moment he first heard it. There is truth in the lyrics. He is not alone. He isn’t as afraid as he used to. And he’s alright, even though the general population of Lima prefers to bully him for what he is.</p><p> </p><p>In sophomore year, Rachel manages to get Finn to date her, his pretty and athletic cheerleader girlfriend all but forgotten. Kurt tries not to be bitter. It’s not really a competition, but everything between him and Rachel seems to be exactly that. And Rachel keeps on winning. She gets the solos, she got the guy. She gets all the attention and glory in glee, and Mr. Schuester plays favorites. Kurt feels sidelined and frustrated.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt vents to Mercedes and befriends Tina. He hides in his music, lets Starchild sing him to sleep more often than not. He thinks of his life and tries to see the bright side. He isn’t pregnant like Quinn, who fell from grace faster than anyone thought was possible. He isn’t hiding anymore, he is proud of who he is. He has friends and he is only two years away from getting to leave Lima. He is going to New York, and he will be amazing. He knows he’s meant for something bigger and better than this, and it’s lurking just behind the corner. He just has to endure and grow, and Lima will steel him more than anything else could.</p><p> </p><p>New Directions lose at Sectionals, but somehow the club is allowed to go on, no matter how hostile principal Figgins and cheerleading coach Sue Sylvester have been. They get to sing together again, and school won’t be all a nightmare. That is the most important thing, not winning any competition.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>2010-2011 Junior Year</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Junior year turns out to be torture. Suddenly the bullying turns personal, and no one notices. Everyone in glee has their own drama to worry about, and Kurt feels lonely and scared. He’s not just another target anymore. It feels like he is <em>the</em> target, the intended victim of all abuse. Dave Karofsky is the worst of them all, and other jocks follow his lead. Karofsky follows Kurt around, creeps him out with his looks and threatening presence. Kurt doesn’t want to talk about it to anyone, since it’s just a nasty feeling, really. And he doesn’t have many chances to voice it, either.</p><p> </p><p>Rachel is caught up in the never-ending tug of war over Finn. Every moment Kurt spends with her is spent listening to her moan and complain about Quinn and what Finn might want and why life is miserable when the boy can’t just make up his mind. Pretty soon Kurt gets fed up and starts avoiding her.</p><p> </p><p>Mercedes seems preoccupied, too, but she doesn’t talk about it. She just fades into the background, staying more silent than she used to. Kurt still goes shopping with her and they gossip together on the phone. They listen to Starchild’s second album together and spend hours talking about the best lyrics and most beautiful parts and the most phenomenal vocals Starchild has recorded. Still Kurt doesn’t show her the bruises that cover his back and arms. Sometimes the bruises are shaped like fingertips, now. Karofsky likes to really grab a hold of him before pushing him away with brute force.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt gets lonely and afraid. He stares at the marks on his arms in the shower and tries not to dread going to school. It’s difficult. He doesn’t like the pain. Before he could handle it, but now it’s becoming unbearable. It’s the constant doubt and fear that is getting to him more than the violence. It’s the threat of it, hanging in the air like some kind of gas, surrounding him, suffocating him slowly.</p><p> </p><p>Then, one day in October, Kurt snaps. Karofsky shoves his phone out of his hands in the hallway before pushing him into a locker door. Kurt gets mad. He can’t take it anymore, the dull ache of his bruises flaring into full-blown pain and the fear that makes his mind a jumbled mess. Maybe it’s his fighting instinct kicking in at last, maybe he’s just frustrated enough to be nearly suicidal, but he follows Karofsky into the boys’ locker room. He has no idea what he is going to do, but he is just so tired of it all. He screams into Karofsky’s face, spits out words that he can hardly hear from the beating of his heart.</p><p> </p><p>Karofsky kisses him.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt spends the next twenty minutes dry-heaving in the toilet. Tears leak from the corners of his eyes as he keeps gagging though nothing comes up. He ends up spitting in the toilet bowl in a desperate attempt to feel even slightly less dirty. He wants the taste of violation out of his mouth, though it mostly lingers in his mind. He feels sick with it. He is a shivering mess when he finally manages to get on his feet from the filthy floor. He can’t even bother to care about his jeans.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt stops by the sinks, stares his reflection in the eye and bites his lip. He can’t quite believe what happened. It feels hazy, almost like a nightmare. Did it really happen? It’s surreal. His eyes are red-rimmed and he still feels vaguely sick. Mostly, he’s lost. He has no idea how to act, how to feel, what to think. He was kissed by a bully. He was kissed by a boy for the first time and it had to be <em>him</em>. Kurt spits into the sink and takes three deep breaths through his nose. It happened. There’s no going back, it actually happened.</p><p> </p><p>He ends up cutting class and driving straight home. There he hides in his room, curls into a tiny ball and wills away the nausea and pain. His ears are ringing, the house is too silent around him. He can hear his own heart beating. His dad won’t be home for hours. Mercedes has a church event after school. That leaves Rachel, even though Kurt isn’t quite sure if he’s able to truly confide in her. He has to tell someone or he bursts. He can’t be alone right now.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt changes his clothes on autopilot, without caring what he puts on. School’s out now, Rachel will get home any minute. Kurt will go there and wait for her if she isn’t home by the time he gets there. Kurt takes his car, half blind in his thoughts, and drives to Rachel’s. As he parks next to the house on the side of the road, he can’t remember anything from the way. He takes three deep breaths to calm himself a little before getting out of the car and walking up to the door.</p><p> </p><p>“Oh, hello… you are not okay.” It’s not Rachel or either of her dads opening the door, no, it has to be Blaine. Kurt vaguely remembers Rachel mentioning that he was coming down for the weekend. Kurt almost wants to turn around, not let Blaine see him like this, but he can’t move. He sniffles and forces his tears away.</p><p> </p><p>“Come on, Kurt, come in,” Blaine says, his voice gentle and warm. Kurt steps inside, and Blaine puts a hand on his shoulder. It’s comforting and it gives Kurt strength. No one but his dad touches him like this these days. That is the reason Kurt breaks down right there, and Blaine hardly has time to close the door before Kurt’s knees stop holding him upright properly.</p><p> </p><p>“Ooh, honey,” Blaine coos and wraps his arms around Kurt’s shoulders. Kurt’s face presses into Blaine’s shoulder, and it’s so safe there that Kurt cries even harder.</p><p> </p><p>No matter how embarrassing it is, Kurt lets Blaine hold him for a while, until the worst panic fades. He steps away from Blaine’s arms without looking him in the eye. He stares and the carpet by their feet instead.</p><p> </p><p>“Let’s sit down, okay?” Blaine says, his warm voice so gentle that Kurt wants to be wrapped in it, no matter how embarrassed he is. Blaine’s hand lingers by Kurt’s side, just close enough for Kurt to feel it.</p><p> </p><p>“Is Rachel home?” Kurt asks first, not moving anywhere.</p><p> </p><p>“No,” Blaine says with a sigh. “She actually just texted me before you arrived. She’s out with Finn. Do you want me to call her?”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt shakes his head. Of course she’s with Finn. “I shouldn’t bother her. I’ll just go back home.”</p><p> </p><p>“You know,” Blaine says and steps a little closer, almost too close, “I’ve been told I’m a good listener. I’m not forcing you to talk, but it might help. You’re already here, so why don’t we sit down and you tell me what upset you?”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt glances at Blaine from under his lashes. Blaine’s beautiful, dark eyes are full of concern and caring, his mouth a thin line. Kurt has to look away. Everything still feels hazy and unreal, a little like a dream, but for a different reason now. Blaine seems like he actually cares, even though he hardly knows Kurt.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay,” Kurt breathes. Just the one word, and Blaine’s hand settles on Kurt’s lower back to guide him to the living room.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt sits gingerly on the couch. He feels out of place here. Usually when he comes over he hangs out in Rachel’s room or down in the basement. Sitting in Berrys’ living room is odd in itself, but on top of that there’s Blaine, beautiful Blaine, sitting right next to him so that their knees almost touch. An awkward silence follows. Kurt knows he is supposed to start talking, but he can’t find the words. How can he tell Blaine what happened, when they barely know each other? They know of each other, because Rachel is close to them both, but that’s it. Kurt clears his throat.</p><p> </p><p>“Just let it out,” Blaine says. “It will help.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt decides to take Blaine’s word and believe it. “You… you know that I’m gay, right?”</p><p> </p><p>Blaine huffs out a weird half-laugh. “Yeah. Rachel mentioned it. I’d say welcome to the club, but I’m not sure if you’d appreciate that, living in this part of the world.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt turns to look at Blaine so fast he almost gets a whiplash, completely forgetting what he was about to share with Blaine. “What?”</p><p> </p><p>Blaine gives him a look and a smile. “I’m gay, too, Kurt. I can probably relate to some of the things you’re going through.</p><p> </p><p>Holy shit, Kurt thinks and suddenly remembers Rachel telling him she’s the only straight one in her family. But that was before Kurt knew Blaine existed, so he had thought it only meant Rachel’s dads. He hadn’t even thought about it after finding out about Blaine, and somehow this news shocks him to the core. Beautiful, caring Blaine is gay.</p><p> </p><p>“What happened? I guess it was at school?” Blaine prompts when Kurt is quiet a little too long with his revelation.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt swallows. “Yes,” he says, and it’s like someone opened the floodgates. He spills everything, how Karofsky has been targeting him, how it has made him feel, and what went down in the locker room earlier that day. He tells Blaine about his fear, the pain, and the immobilizing helplessness that has made him jump at every loud noise he hears. He tells Blaine how it has made him angry, but he has been too scared to let that anger out. He tells Blaine about the frustration of having been robbed of his first kiss like that, the nausea that still lingers in the back of his mouth, and how he is not looking forward to going to school on Monday. Blaine huffs and hmms in all the right places, giving Kurt space to let it all out, and when Kurt tells him about the kiss, there’s a warm hand squeezing Kurt’s own.</p><p> </p><p>“God, Kurt,” Blaine breathes once Kurt stops talking. “That is so wrong on so many levels that I don’t even know where to start. You are going talk about this to your teachers, right?”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt shakes his head and tries to ignore how Blaine is still holding his hand. “I do not believe in outing people. He has to do it in his own terms. Besides everyone and their mother knows I’m being bullied. I’ve tried to say something about it, but nothing ever happens. They don’t care.”</p><p> </p><p>Blaine gets up from the couch with a frustrated noise and paces on the floor in front of Kurt. Kurt’s hand feels cold and empty without Blaine’s touch.</p><p> </p><p>“I cannot believe this. One would think that the world changes in half a decade but no. Fucking bastards, the lot of them.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt blinks. Blaine just swore. Blaine, who has always been the picture perfect of a polite, mild-mannered young man, offering smiles and handshakes and how are yous. He seems like a different person, pacing there with his hands clenched and swearwords on his lips. Who is this? Kurt is shocked, because this does not fit the image of Blaine he has in his head. Blaine is calm and collected with gentle eyes and warm smiles, not <em>this</em>. Blaine looks like he’s about to punch something, and it scares Kurt a little, because the most negative thing he’s ever seen Blaine do is roll his eyes at Rachel. But at the same time, it’s thrilling that the injustice Kurt faces gets this kind of reaction out of Blaine. Finally it feels like someone cares.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Blaine says and stops. “This… this just brings back some memories. I want to help you, Kurt, but there’s not much I can do from the outside. Please, tell someone, a teacher, about this. Even just a part of it. Show them a bruise, or whatever, just please. You should not go through that every day.”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt just nods mutely. What else can he do?</p><p> </p><p>“Give me your phone,” Blaine says next.</p><p> </p><p>“What, what, why?” Kurt stutters, his heart beating triple time suddenly. Blaine is not going to call his dad, is he? Kurt can’t tell his dad, he doesn’t want to make him stress.</p><p> </p><p>“I’m giving you my number. All I can do is listen, be someone to lean on. If it gets to be too much, or if you just need to vent, I want you to call me. I can relate to this. Not fully,of course,  and I don’t claim to understand everything you are feeling, but I know what it’s like to be where you are.” Blaine is so earnest, so serious, that Kurt can’t help but fall for him a little. No one, other than his dad, has ever cared this much, given him this much.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, okay,” Kurt says and digs his phone out of his pocket, handing it to Blaine. He can feel a blush on his face, and he can’t quite meet Blaine’s eyes.</p><p> </p><p>Blaine is giving him his number.</p><p> </p><p>The gorgeous, gentlemanly and gay brother of Kurt’s best friend is putting his number into Kurt’s contacts. Kurt has to close his eyes for a moment. Too much has happened. The day has been crazy and so long and Kurt really doesn’t know which way is up anymore.</p><p> </p><p>“There,” Blaine says and gives Kurt his phone back. “Call me. Or text me. Whenever you need someone to listen to you, I’ll be there.”</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you,” is all Kurt can manage.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>Kurt never calls or texts Blaine. He wouldn’t know what to say, how to start. He does tell Mr. Schue about Karofsky, but not about the kiss. Mr. Schue takes him over to Sue, who is acting as principal, and they offer their condolences. That’s all Kurt gets from it. Nothing really gets done. He still walks quickly in the halls when he’s alone, and stays wary even when he has friends around.</p><p> </p><p>Still, Blaine gave him courage. Blaine reminded Kurt that he’s not completely alone. And even though Kurt never gets brave enough to use the number Blaine put into his phone, he does stare at it every once in a while.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>The spring semester of Junior Year goes by really fast. The New Directions go to Nationals this year and Kurt gets to see New York. It’s everything. He loves the noise and the buzz and the tall buildings, he loves the theaters and the atmosphere. The trip to Nationals seals what he already had decided: he needs to go to New York. It’s where he belongs. Even though they fail at Nationals (no thanks to Rachel and Finn for screwing it up spectacularly), it’s worth it to get to see New York. Kurt swears he will return there in a year. Only one year. He can do it – he has lasted this long, one more year is nothing when he knows what awaits him.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>2011 Autumn of Senior Year</em>
</p><p>
  
</p><p>Senior year starts like all the years before: Kurt hates going back to McKinley, he seems to be the only one with no romance in his life whatsoever, and people are freaking out about this or that. In his group of friends, there’s always drama. Rachel and Finn are an item again, and Mercedes had a thing with some jock. She tries to keep it secret, but in their little circle nothing stays secret for long. Kurt tries to be happy for them, but it isn’t easy.</p><p> </p><p>Truth is, it aches. It hurts to long for romance and physical closeness and kisses that seem to be forever out of his reach. For everyone else, it seems so easy. Kurt stares at couples in the hallways, envying their happiness and the possibility they have and he lacks: they can run down the hallway hand in hand, they can make out in corners or sneak off during lunch just to be alone together. He will never get that. He looks at Rachel and Finn, walking hand in hand to class, and wonders why he isn’t allowed the same chance. It’s unfair.</p><p> </p><p>He tries to focus on school. He is going to apply to New York Academy of Dramatic Arts that Ms Pillsbury presented to him and Rachel. He is going to New York, he is going to say goodbye to Lima and all the pain McKinley has inflicted on him. He will start a new life after graduation, and then he will get everything he has ever dreamed of. In New York he will get to shine, and there will be someone there to love him, too. He’ll just have to sit tight until he gets there.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt is all set with his plans for his senior year and after that when October rolls around. It seems to be the month of change for him – everything seems to happen in October. He is getting dressed in the morning, thinking about his senior class president campaign, wondering what song to sing in glee this week, and then he checks Twitter.</p><p> </p><p>He almost faints when he sees the news there.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>“Mercedes!” Kurt spots his friend in the school parking lot and rushes after her. He is bursting with excitement. “Did you see the news?”</p><p> </p><p>Mercedes looks at him with raised eyebrows. “I don’t think so?”</p><p> </p><p>“Starchild! He is coming to Ohio! He has a gig in Columbus in February, they have decided to extend his tour!” Kurt is jumping up and down, barely keeping in his happiness. “We’re going, right?” Kurt is pretty sure he has never been this excited about anything in his life. Elliott Starchild is going to be in Ohio for the first time, and Kurt will make sure he gets to be there.</p><p> </p><p>“Hell yes!” Mercedes smiles. “Am I dreaming? Is this for real?”</p><p> </p><p>“It is! I checked his website, there are five more locations added to his tour! The tickets will be on sale next Monday,” Kurt tells her and giggles. “We are going to see Starchild live in concert!”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh my god, it will be amazing,” Mercedes gushes.</p><p> </p><p>“Could we get a hotel room in Columbus, what do you think?” Kurt asks as they head into the school. “We could make a weekend of it, shop a little and sit at some cafés.”</p><p> </p><p>Mercedes turns quiet. “It sounds amazing, Kurt, but I’m not sure I have enough money for that. Not all of us work during the weekends for our dads. Just getting the ticket will be tough if my parents don’t help.”</p><p> </p><p>“Come on, there’s time to save still,” Kurt tries. He won’t let something like that ruin his plans.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, I know, but I don’t have a job.”</p><p> </p><p>“Just ask your parents, Mercedes, pretty please? It would be the highlight of the year! They must understand that you need to get there.”</p><p> </p><p>Mercedes just looks sad now, and Kurt’s excitement is quickly dissolving into despair.</p><p> </p><p>“It’s been pretty tight with money lately. Granma is getting worse, and the hospital bills need to be paid.” Mercedes bites her lip.</p><p> </p><p>“We’ll find a way, okay?” Kurt reassures her.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>It’s not that easy to find the way, though. Mercedes does ask her parents, but even after three days of begging and pleading they won’t budge. Kurt goes over and they try together, but Mercedes’ dad just gives them a sad look and a sigh. There’s no money to spare, and he isn’t really into letting his 17-year-old daughter travel to Columbus alone. No amount of “Kurt will be 18 by then” is helping their case. Not only is the hotel room out of the question. It soon turns out that Mercedes can’t go at all.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt returns home with a crestfallen face and a deep disappointment. He feels like crying. It’s not fair.</p><p> </p><p>“What’s up, bud?” Burt asks when he gets home and sees his son sulking in the living room.</p><p> </p><p>“Mercedes’ dad won’t let her come to the concert with me.” Kurt knows he’s whining, but he’s just so mad, it’s so unfair. “I’ll have to go alone and I hate it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay, Kurt, hold up. Alone? Are you planning on going to Columbus alone?”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt shrugs. “I am not missing out on that concert.”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t like that.”</p><p> </p><p>“Dad!” Kurt turns to stare at his dad. “You know what this means to me!”</p><p> </p><p>“Kurt…”</p><p> </p><p>“I will be 18 by then. I’m going to New York in the summer anyway! Where is this coming from? Don’t you trust me?” Kurt’s heart is hammering inside his chest, his hands are shaking. He needs to go to that concert. Starchild helped him accept who he is, Starchild gave him hope when he felt worst. Kurt needs to see him in concert, because who knows when there’s another chance for that. His dad can’t be so cruel.</p><p> </p><p>“I trust you, bud, but I don’t trust other people. You should have someone with you. I know that you will be in New York on your own, son, I do. But those kinds of concerts can attract all kinds of people, and I worry. Is there no one that you could ask to come with?”</p><p> </p><p>“I guess I could ask Tina and Rachel,” Kurt mutters, a little mad at his dad though he knows what is behind the reasoning. Tina is kind of into Starchild, not as much as Kurt and Mercedes, but enough to be interested. Rachel, on the other hand, is a reach. They’re all Kurt has, and he has to try. He needs to go to that concert. Not going isn’t really an option.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you,” Kurt’s dad says. “Let me know how it goes.”</p><p> </p><p>“I’ll ask them right away,” Kurt says and gets his phone. He sends a quick text to both Tina and Rachel, and proceeds to wait impatiently. His dad is reading the paper in his chair, and Kurt fiddles with some magazines he’s left on the table. He picks one up, tries to fall into an article about upcoming pant trends, but he can’t concentrate on it. He has to get to that concert, no matter what. He has looked up to Starchild for years, and he needs to see a live show. He has seen enough videos that he knows it will be amazing. And it’s more than that. Starchild is his idol, his role model – a gay guy with a real career in showbiz.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt is so lost in thought that the coming text startles him. It’s from Tina.</p><p> </p><p>Tina: Sounds interesting. When is this?</p><p> </p><p>Kurt: Friday Feb 17<sup>th</sup>. Please tell me you can come!</p><p> </p><p>Tina: OH noooo. My grandpa turns 70 on the 18<sup>th</sup> and there’s this huge party planned. Mom would never forgive me!</p><p> </p><p>Kurt can feel the tears burning in his eyes. This can’t be happening to him. Why can’t he ever have anything he wants? Rachel is his last hope, and he can’t really count on that. Basically, this is it. He will not be seeing Starchild. Typical, just his luck. Nothing ever goes his way, and it’s getting boring. Can’t things go right for once?</p><p> </p><p>“Tina can’t come,” he tells his dad.</p><p> </p><p>“Listen,” Burt starts to say, but is interrupted by Kurt’s phone ringing.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi Rachel,” Kurt greets into the phone and begs in his mind for Rachel to say that she’ll come.</p><p> </p><p>“Hello, Kurt.” The voice on the other end of the line is not Rachel. “It’s Blaine. Rachel wouldn’t give me your number so I had to steal her phone.”</p><p> </p><p>“Hi,” Kurt squeaks. He thinks he can hear Rachel on the background, but mostly he’s just stunned to be on the phone with Blaine. He can feel his face growing hot, and knows his dad is right there, and oh dear what is he supposed to say?</p><p> </p><p>“So, I hear you want to go see Starchild,” Blaine says.</p><p> </p><p>“He loves Starchild, Blaine,” Kurt can hear Rachel say, and he blushes even more. By now Burt has realized something is up, and he gives Kurt a puzzled look. Kurt ignores it.</p><p> </p><p>“Yes, I really want to go to the concert.”</p><p> </p><p>“I don’t think Rachel is quite as into it, unfortunately.”</p><p> </p><p>“I know,” Kurt sighs. “But I need someone to go with me. Dad doesn’t like me going alone.” He feels like a child, telling that to Blaine.</p><p> </p><p>“Would he let you go with me, then?”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt blinks, unable to breathe for a second. His hands start shaking and he doesn’t know what to say.</p><p> </p><p>“Kurt?” Blaine prompts with gentle humor in his voice.</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, yeah, I… I, thanks, for, you know, for offering that, I mean…” Kurt stumbles over his words, because he never expected anything like this.</p><p> </p><p>“Kurt, what’s going on?” his dad asks, and Kurt absolutely cannot look at him right now.</p><p> </p><p>“Is that your dad?” Blaine asks. “Let me talk to him?”</p><p> </p><p>“Yeah, okay,” Kurt stutters even though a part of him wants to scream that he is not a child. He shoves the phone at his dad, who takes it. Kurt is still shaking.</p><p> </p><p>“You’re Rachel’s brother?” Burt asks after a moment, a slight edge to his voice. Kurt wishes he could hear both sides of the conversation.</p><p> </p><p>“Uh huh. It’s all he’s talked about all week.” Kurt wants the ground to swallow him.</p><p> </p><p>“Hold on, young man. You live there? How old are you again?”</p><p> </p><p>“No, that’s fine. But no funny business. I know your parents.”  Kurt could die of mortification. He is not a child. His dad doesn’t even know that Blaine is gay, does he? He hazards a look at his dad and sees him smirking. Then Burt says his goodbyes and gives the phone back to Kurt with a shrewd look. Kurt bites his lip and defiantly looks his father in the eye.</p><p> </p><p>“Hi again,” he says into the phone and turns away.</p><p> </p><p>“Hey. Looks like you’re coming to visit me in February.” Kurt could very well wrap himself into that warm, smooth voice.</p><p> </p><p>“I am?”</p><p> </p><p>Blaine laughs. “Yes, absolutely. And you’re staying over, no need to pay for a hotel.”</p><p> </p><p>“Oh wow,” Kurt blurts out, blinking. He is spending the night at Blaine’s.</p><p> </p><p>Blaine just laughs again, a happy, pure sound. “Okay, Rachel wants her phone back. Text me, I want your number so that we can talk about details.”</p><p> </p><p>“Okay,” Kurt agrees. How is he going to survive this?</p><p> </p><p>“Okay,” Blaine echoes. “I’ll be waiting. Bye for now.”</p><p> </p><p>“Bye,” Kurt says and the call disconnects. He’s stunned. For a moment he just sits there staring at nothing. He’s almost certain his desperate brain made him hallucinate the whole thing. It’s so unreal. He was on the phone with Blaine, and now he’s going there to Blaine’s – only buying a ticket stands between him and the concert of his dreams. Only now he’s more excited and freaking out over staying at Blaine’s.</p><p> </p><p>Kurt’s dad is good at bringing his son back to reality, though. He coughs meaningfully to get Kurt to look at him. Oh god, it really did happen.</p><p> </p><p>“So, Rachel’s big brother. You know him well?”</p><p> </p><p>Kurt shrugs, trying to act normal. This crush is not something he wants to discuss with his dad, no matter that they’ve talked about everything in the past. “Not that well, really. We’ve talked a little when he’s been home and I’ve been to Rachel’s. He’s one of the nicest people I’ve met.”</p><p> </p><p>“And you like this guy?”</p><p> </p><p>“He’s a real gentleman,” Kurt deflects.</p><p> </p><p>“Not what I asked, buddy,” Burt laughs.</p><p> </p><p>“Okay, fine,” Kurt sighs. “Yes, I like him, but he is Rachel’s brother and 23.” Five and a half years feels like a lot. Maybe, if they were 25 and 31, it wouldn’t feel so awfully large a gap. Blaine is finishing college, and Kurt is just a high school senior.</p><p> </p><p>“Kurt, look after yourself there, alright? I trust Blaine because I know who raised him, and it’s not that big a town. I know about him, and he’s a good kid. Still you have to keep yourself safe, you hear me? Don’t let him take advantage.”</p><p> </p><p>“Dad!” As if Blaine would do such a thing. Kurt is appalled at his dad’s hints.</p><p> </p><p>“Just a thought,” Burt shrugs.</p><p> </p><p>*</p><p> </p><p>Later that night, Kurt lies in bed, awake, staring at the ceiling. He still can’t quite believe it. It’s impossible to sleep, but it’s Friday, so it’s fine. His mind keeps going through the conversations he had, the words Blaine said, and what Kurt answered. He is going to the concert, after all, and he is going there with Blaine. It’s insane. Why would Blaine want to take him along? Kurt is happy, he is ecstatic, but he wonders. What made Blaine offer to go to the concert with Kurt? Kurt is so excited that his skin tingles, but at the same time, he’s terrified. What will he wear? What can he say? What if it gets awkward and they just sit in silence? Kurt Hummel is going to an Elliott Starchild concert, and he will spend the night at his crush’s apartment.</p><p> </p><p>If someone had told him that morning what would transpire, he would have laughed in their face. Now it’s a reality. He is going to Columbus. He is going to see Starchild perform. He is going to the concert with Blaine, and Blaine will take him home after. Kurt can’t help but giggle into his pillow a little.</p><p> </p><p>Can it be February already?</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading, please tell me what you think! </p><p>You can also find me on tumblr under little-escapist.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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